Holiday Heartaches

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Kindling Grief
Christmas or Hanukkah holidays can kindle killer sorrow after loss, disappointment or, memories of missteps.  Some choose avoidance as a strategy to handle grief during holidays. You? Whether a friend let you down, a schedule left you stressed, or you dread dealing with family baggage, holiday traditions tend to bring fears and frustrations face to face.

Here are some tips to help deal with holiday grief:

  • Set realistic goals—Care for yourself, and you will also build emotional capacity to care about others. Rather than follow traditional gift-giving demands, give something that comes from your strengths.
  • Give yourself a gift you’d love to receive—Think of something you’d love to receive and then go get it.  Perhaps your gift reminds you of a person you’ve most admired in life.
  • Buy a gift for somebody who least expects it —Choose somebody from your church, neighborhood, or community center and give a gift that person would likely enjoy most. Expect nothing in return and giving offers even more emotional cheer.
  • Uptick your emotional and social health before it works against you—For instance, imagine possibilities that can trigger fun over sadness.  Then, design a plan to handle those emotional missteps when Christmas grief tries to dominate.

Meet the namungo gang who’ll help you:

Spot comfort from happy memories—we now know that with focus, we can move beyond grief and savor happy memories that fill emotions with joy and love. Savor these moments and they begin to replace fears or frustrations that crept in from miserable memories. START HERE

Restore your strength—by eating well, walking or exercising in a way you enjoy, and sleeping enough to rewire your brain so that it helps you see and anticipate new benefits in the holidays ahead.

Sadly, there is no way to bring back lost friends, erase words misspoken, or prevent Christmas grief that stands knocking, Rather than open your door to grief, though, what if you value what you once had, by building a new relationship or restoring your sense of adventure by doing one thing you enjoy most to prepare for the coming holiday.

See further activities that help you to avoid grief by ramping up a sense of wonder and curiosity for what the coming holiday holds for those who prepare emotional and social health to receive it.

To access further practical strategies to sidestep grief, you’ll enjoy this article on your brain’s awesome ability to handle a broken heart

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Created by Ellen Weber, Brain Based Tasks for Growth Mindset